DN Randomness
by AnimeYaoiFangirl100
Summary: Some might be funny, some serious. You never know when the characters of Death Note are involved! Crazy, serious, insane, sane, eccentric, normal, blandness, hilarity, anything goes! Anything and everything is welcome when you have the Death Note gang!
1. MarshMello

**Welcome, my pets, to _DN Randomness_! **

**Marsh-Mello**

**Sorry, I had to do that. ^^'**

**Now, I** **know that I have a lot of stories that are unfinished, and I told myself that I would start no more of them. Which, technically I am not. I am starting a collection of one-shots about our favorite Death Note characters! 8D Now, I wasn't going to do something like this, but as I am obsessed with Death Note right now, I keep having random ideas for things and so, since some of these are too short to be actual stories in my opinion, here this collection is. **

**I am working on my other stories too, I swear it, but sometimes you can't write with no inspiration. Or, in Math class, when I can't get on my laptop and when I have the most inspiration...and I can't write it because I sit in the front...**

**I hope that you enjoy these and this first one came to me in Science class! So thank my teacher for being so boring! 8D**

**Alas, I don't own Matt, Mello, or Ghostbusters... I only own the DVD's for Ghostbusters 1 & 2 and I have the Ghostbusters theme song on my laptop. **

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><p>"HOLY SHIT! Mello, get in here! You're on T.V!" A screech came from the other room, making said blonde drop one of the bags that he was holding.<p>

Mello bolted into the room, panicking. What other reason would there be for him to be on T.V? _Someone ratted me out! _He thought angrily. He was already planning the death of whoever ratted him out to the cops.

The blonde-haired mafia boss looked at the television, expecting to see himself doing something illegal, but he didn't see that. He saw... Ghostbusters?

"It's the Stay Puft Marsh-Mellow man!" Matt yelled in laughter as he saw the confused look the blonde's face took on. The red-head pointed at the giant walking marshmallow on the screen.

Matt was about to say something else, but before he could something hit his head. No, it was thrown at his head.

"You dumb ass." Mello stated plainly, as if that happened everyday. His face was slightly flushed and that made the red-head laugh louder. The only reason Mello was adoring a new pink skin color was because he was embarrassed that he actually thought somebody had found him. Like that would ever happen.

With one last growl Mello stomped over to Matt, took the one bag that he was still holding, and dumped the contents all over him. With that the blonde walked out of the room, leaving the red-head covered in marshmallows. The hot tempered blonde smirked as he made his way back into the kitchen. _It's what Matt gets for making me panic over nothing. _He thought.

"Damn Matt. Making me stop making my S'mores..." The mafia boss muttered as he went bag to the cupboard to look for another bag of marshmallows.


	2. Could L Be Santa

**Could L Be Santa...?**

**Possibly! 8D X3 Enjoy this. I made it for Christmas! **

**I don't own Santa, L, Near, Matt, Mello or BB. **

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><p>The raven haired teen looked and felt silly. If it wasn't for the fact that he wanted those cookies he wouldn't be wearing this ridiculous outfit. The barefoot 16 year old was wearing a red and white suit that was easily too big for him, but he managed it by tightening the black belt a fair amount. His messy black hair was hidden under a red and white hat.<p>

Normally he wouldn't have even have done something so preposterous. He wouldn't have had to dress up like this. The presents had been set out earlier in the evening, after all the children went to their rooms, but some of the children were known to venture out at night so it was better safe than sorry. Some of the older ones, such as Mello, Matt, and Near, knew that there was no such thing as Santa Claus, and he didn't think that it was important for the younger kids, but Watari insisted that he didn't ruin it for them.

So, here L was. A genius that knew that there was no such thing as Santa, dressed in a Santa suit. _The things I do for sweets._He thought with a small sigh.

He continued to walk in his haunched over position towards the main room, that held the delicious double chocolate chip cookies. That is, until he heard the soft sounds of footsteps. L did not want to deal with the children right now. He just wanted to get his cookies and leave. He didn't want to have to act like a figure from a child's imagination just to make them go back to bed. If that would even work.

Before L could hide he heard a small gasp, or two, or three of them. L turned his head so that he was looking over his shoulder. He sighed in some odd sort of relief. It was not any of the children that still believed in Santa.

"Mello, Matt, Near. What are the three of you doing down here at this hour?"

"We could ask you the same thing, L." The blonde in front retorted back.

"Um, Mello wanted to come..." The young red head mumbled and his friend elbowed him in the stomach.

"Of course he did." The young genius said with a sigh. "What was Mello wanting to find?"

"Nothing." Said blonde insisted. Though, the youngest of the trio had other thoughts.

"Mello was wanting to get those cookies that the other kids left out for Santa." The young albino said as he moved a little closer to Matt when Mello shot him a look.

"Traitors..." He muttered. _So we are after the same thing._L thought.

"I will make the three of you a deal." I said after a couple minutes of silence. The three boys just looked at him again, their eyes sparkling with something.

"What?" The three of them asked. Matt and Mello normally did stuff like this, and if Near did it too then it was something to marvel in.

"Since I was meaning to take those cookies anyway, I will share them with the three of you as long as no one speaks a word of this."

"Of this meeting, or are wearing a Santa suit?" Near asked. He was the youngest one, having just turned 9.

"Both." L said and then raised an eyebrow at the three boys.

"Sounds good to me." Mello said and Matt just nodded. "This meeting never happened."

"Now that we all agree on that, on to those cookies." The raven led the way into the main room, which held the tree and all it's presents. More importantly, the cookies. The four boys walked silently towards the cookies. As soon as L grabbed the plate he turned around to face the boys.

"Now, in order to not get caught by Watari or Roger or any of the other children, we will be heading to my room. Let's go now, and quickly." He was about to start walking again when he heard another voice, but more jolly sounding. The three prepubescents looked around him as he turned his head to look at where it was coming from.

"Ho, ho, h-" The fat old man wearing a red suit stopped making that cheerful sound when he saw L and the children. More specifically, when he saw the plate of cookies in L's hand.

The man was portly and was wearing a red suit, most like the one L was wearing, and he had a bushy white beard. The staring match between the four boys and the old man took a while. Nobody blinked, nobody made a sound. It was as quiet as a mouse. As of which, mice tend to make a small noise, so everything was quiet until Matt made a gasping sound of shock.

"I-it can't be." The red head didn't have his goggles, but what he did have was an abnormally large mouth that was gaping open. His companions where thinking along the same lines.

"Impossible..." L was the only one to voice anything other than Matt, and to say that he was the most shocked would be an understatement. It couldn't have been Watari or Roger in that suit, and it certainly wasn't someone that he knew.

"I'll come back later." The old man said before disappearing into thin air. Before they knew what was happening the younger children watched as L collapsed onto his back.

L's mind couldn't comprehend what he just saw so it shut down, making him fall back into an unconscious state. To put it simply, he fainted. The blonde, red head, and albino surrounded their raven haired idol.

"Is he alright..?" Near asked.

"Of course he is! He's L." Mello stated.

"Well, it looks to me like Santa actually does exist." Matt said and he exchanged glances with the other two.

"It's not Watari, or Roger."

"So, who is he?"

"Who cares at the moment? Let's try and get L up to his room before the others wake up and think that we killed Santa." Near said. "We can figure out who that man was later."

With that, the three boys managed to get the raven up the stairs, but he was a lot heavier than he looked. Especially for three boys with the oldest of them being a skinny 11 year old that eats nothing but chocolate all day. The only reason they managed to get L to his room was because Beyond Birthday, a 14 year old, had seen them when he was heading to raid the kitchen of strawberry jam.

He didn't ask any questions, just said that they needed to be careful with our games next time, and then he left with a frustrated Mello trying to quietly yell at him.

When the boys looked down at L again he looked fairly peaceful, but he was trying to peace together the puzzle of Santa Claus from his sleeping state.

"So, who is Santa really?" Mello wondered aloud.

"Well, it's not L." Matt said simply as he gazed at the teenager that had fainted because his brain didn't comprehend the idea of Santa Claus.


	3. Just Get In The Damn Room

**Just Get In The Damn Room**

**I don't own Matt or Mello. Or anyone else mentioned in this.**

**You know what? Let's just say that I own NOTHING in this story, unless I make an authors note saying otherwise.**

**Enjoy!**

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><p>Mello had just gotten a chocolate bar and was trying to think of things on how to beat Kira before Near did. God did he hate that bastard... Mello growled and snapped off a piece of chocolate. He still couldn't think of anything, not for the past few days. His mind had been occupied by other things.<p>

My red-headed best friend had just gotten back from the store and was about to go take a shower, which he _had_ to announce. Not like I minded that he did... _Shut up, thoughts!_Mello thought as he growled again and face-palmed.

"What's wrong, Mells?" Matt asked stopping in the doorway as he looked back at the ex-mafia boss.

"Like you could do anything about it." The blonde scoffed at the younger male. "But I can't think of a way to beat Near and finish Kira before him. I need to find information on that Death Note that I lost so maybe I could get an edge over that albino bastard!" He ended up raising his voice, like he always does when talking about said albino brat.

"If you want information, try Google. It has everything." The goggled boy said carelessly as he walked into the bathroom. It was true, he really couldn't do anything about Mello's lack of information, and the worst that would happen was him getting hit as soon as he got out of the shower.

Mello just sat there staring at the laptop screen. He still hadn't thought of any ideas for how to get to it and so he decided to do what Matt suggested, no matter how stupid it was._It is something to do and it might actually do something to help me with this case._He thought.

He quickly went to Google and typed in "Death Note" in the search bar. Surprisingly, or at least surprising to Mello, a bunch of images came up. Some that actually did look like the Death Note that the blonde had possessed while others were images of L, Light Yagami, and that Misa chick. Mello had even seen a picture of himself and Watari! Mello scowled slightly when he saw a picture of Near, but he was amused with this search.

As Matt came out of the bathroom around 20 minutes later he was glad that he didn't get a fist in his face, but he was some-what worried what was going through Mello's head. He assumed that as long as he didn't get hit, or shot, he should be fine. Then again, it was Mello we were talking about, and Mello, as we all know, is as unpredictable as a bat out of hell.

The red-headed teen grabbed his new DS and plopped down in the chair, seeing as he wanted to be as far away from Mello incase the blonde were to blow a gasket. He just turned on his game and returned to his game of Mario Kart.

Mello kept going through pictures until he finally got to the bottom of the page. He frowned. This wasn't really helping him at all with his investigation, but it was keeping his boredom at bay. He thought of something else to type in, and he figured, the hell with it! He typed in "Mello Kheel." The search came up with some pictures of himself and some other random people he had never heard of.

His eyes widened considerably when he found a rather disturbing picture of him and L...with L topping. The blonde shivered at the thought. Yes, he might have respected the panda-eyed detective but he did not like him in _that_way.

He refused to look at any of the other pictures on the page. That one that Mello has stumbled upon seemed to shake him more than he wanted to admit. The blonde chose to look at his best-friend, and decided to type in "Matt Jeevas" into the search engine.

The pictures that Mello saw were not for all eyes. If he had his way they would all be his. Let me just tell you that they were all as sexy as hell. Now, I better shut up now before Mello decides to shoot me.

_She better stop breaking that damn wall._Mello mentally growled, but then he stopped as he caught sight of another very sexy picture of Matt. The farther he got down the page the more he liked the pictures, that is until he saw one picture.

He growled at it, for the millionth time that day. Inside Mello felt much more angry than he was acting like. Mello took a glance at his friend as he continued playing his game.

"Get in the bedroom now." Mello said as his blonde hair shadowed his eyes.

"What? I never did anything!"

"Room, now."

"But-" Mello slammed the laptop shut and dropped it on the table, not caring if it was damaged.

"NOW!" The blonde stood up, grabbed Matt by the collar of his striped shirt and drug him into the bedroom.


	4. The Tape

**The Tape**

**I only own Temara. No Matt and Mello for me... T^T**

**Enjoy!**

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><p>"Just give it back!" The blonde yelled as he grabbed his gun and chased after a girl with brown hair, brown eyes, and caramel colored skin. She had taken something from him and he was going to get it.<p>

The girl looked to be about 16, so Mello had no clue how she had outsmarted him in this matter. _Especially_this matter. Nobody outsmarts him, not on things that are this important.

"You have to catch me first!" The young girl yelled as she ran around a corner. Mello raced after her even faster, determined not to let her get away. He needed to get that tape back. He should have taken his bike but he hadn't thought of getting it, even if he had had the time to do so.

_I have to admit, she is pretty fast._The blonde thought as he raced after the brunette. He needed that tape. It was life or death. He didn't even know who this chick was and what she wanted.

Finally Mello caught a break when she ran down an alley, that lead to a dead end. She stopped in front of the brick wall and pressed he back against it and glared at Mello as he approached her.

"Get away from me, or I'll scream." She promised as she glared at the blonde harder. Then she grew slightly pale when he turned her icy blue glare on her.

"There is nobody around here this time of day." He growled out. "Just give it back."

"Give what back?"

"Give that tape you took back right now!"

"What? You gonna throw a tantrum?"

"Just give me that damn tape and tell me why you want it."

"Why _wouldn't_I want it? That's the real question here. Why should I give it back? You already know what happens on it." Mello just raised his gun at her and she raised her hands.

"Give it here, girly!"

"Don't call me that! My name is Temara not girly, you asshole!" She objected.

"Fine, whatever! Just give me that damn tape and don't call me that!"

"Call you what? Asshole? Well this tape says differently." She huffed. The blonde one of the two raised his gun toward the brunettes face.

"Just hand over the sex tape of me and Matt and no one gets hurt." He said these words very seriously, and made sure that the safety was off. It was off. Seriously, would it be Mello if he ever had the safety on on his gun?


	5. Your Problem

**Your Problem**

**This was a B-day present for Mello. I completely forgot about his birthday fic and it didn't get done, so I took 10 minutes out of my English class to write this short thing...**

**Enjoy! 8D**

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><p>"Ow, dammit get it out or move!" The redhead yelled. He was blushing like mad and almost out of breathe.<p>

"Oh shut your trap!" The blonde on top of him snapped, even though he was just as out of breathe as his friend. "I'm trying to help you here!"

"This is called help? This hurts you asshole! Just move!"

"I can't do that if you want the pain to go away! It will just get worse unless I take care of it, you dumb ass!"

"The hell it will! It will just have to go away on it's own!"

"Just shut up and let me finish this!"

"Why? You were the one that made this problem in the first place." The young teenager squirmed underneath his blonde friend, trying to get him to let him be. Or, to at least make the pain stop. It was burning him.

"Yes. I fully admit that I made the problem and that is why I am trying to fix it!" Mello insisted as he fumbled to try and get his best friends' shirt off of him.

"That doesn't mean that I want you to take care of it!"

"Matt, just shut your mouth already!" The soon-to-be 15 year old snapped, trying to get him to stop squirming. That was only making the problem worse.

"I will keep this up until you move!"

"Well I am not going to! Just get used to my presence." Mello just merely grunted after his words when Matt bucked his hips upwards.

"I don't know if I can! It's uncomfortable!"

"Matt, just shut the fuck up and stay there while I deal with this!" He had finally gotten the striped shirt off. "Damn..."

"Yes, you asshole." Matt at least stopped yelling, but his voice was still raised. "See how big the problem you caused is now?"

"Matt..."

"What now?"

"I'm sorry that I stabbed you with a butter knife."


	6. Just Get In The Damn Room Version 2

**Just Get In The Damn Room: Version 2**

**This is the continuation of 'Just Get In The Damn Room' because my grandma and grandpa Moore don't have internet and then I didn't know what to write and so I just continued on with this. So this is the original along with the added on part. **

**I own Tony and my voice. I certainly own THAT...**

**Enjoy!**

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><p>Mello had just gotten a chocolate bar and was trying to think of things on how to beat Kira before Near did. God did he hate that bastard... Mello growled and snapped off a piece of chocolate. He still couldn't think of anything, not for the past few days. His mind had been occupied by other things.<p>

My red-headed best friend had just gotten back from the store and was about to go take a shower, which he had to announce. Not like I minded that he did... _Shut up, thoughts!_Mello thought as he growled again and face-palmed.

"What's wrong, Mells?" Matt asked stopping in the doorway as he looked back at the ex-mafia boss.

"Like you could do anything about it." The blonde scoffed at the younger male. "But I can't think of a way to beat Near and finish Kira before him. I need to find information on that Death Note that I lost so maybe I could get an edge over that albino bastard!" He ended up raising his voice, like he always does when talking about said albino brat.

"If you want information, try Google. It has everything." The goggled boy said carelessly as he walked into the bathroom. It was true, he really couldn't do anything about Mello's lack of information, and the worst that would happen was him getting hit as soon as he got out of the shower.

Mello just sat there staring at the laptop screen. He still hadn't thought of any ideas for how to get to it and so he decided to do what Matt suggested, no matter how stupid it was._It is something to do and it might actually do something to help me with this case._He thought.

He quickly went to Google and typed in "Death Note" in the search bar. Surprisingly, or at least surprising to Mello, a bunch of images came up. Some that actually did look like the Death Note that the blonde had possessed while others were images of L, Light Yagami, and that Misa chick. Mello had even seen a picture of himself and Watari! Mello scowled slightly when he saw a picture of Near, but he was amused with this search.

As Matt came out of the bathroom around 20 minutes later he was glad that he didn't get a fist in his face, but he was some-what worried what was going through Mello's head. He assumed that as long as he didn't get hit, or shot, he should be fine. Then again, it was Mello we were talking about, and Mello, as we all know, is as unpredictable as a bat out of hell.

The red-headed teen grabbed his new DS and plopped down in the chair, seeing as he wanted to be as far away from Mello incase the blonde were to blow a gasket. He just turned on his game and returned to his game of Mario Kart.

Mello kept going through pictures until he finally got to the bottom of the page. He frowned. This wasn't really helping him at all with his investigation, but it was keeping his boredom at bay. He thought of something else to type in, and he figured, the hell with it! He typed in "Mello Kheel." The search came up with some pictures of himself and some other random people he had never heard of.

His eyes widened considerably when he found a rather disturbing picture of him and L...with L topping. The blonde shivered at the thought. Yes, he might have respected the panda-eyed detective but he did not like him in _that_way.

He refused to look at any of the other pictures on the page. That one that Mello has stumbled upon seemed to shake him more than he wanted to admit. The blonde chose to look at his best-friend, and decided to type in "Matt Jeevas" into the search engine.

The pictures that Mello saw were not for all eyes. If he had his way they would all be his. Let me just tell you that they were all as sexy as hell. Now, I better shut up now before Mello decides to shoot me.

_She better stop breaking that damn wall._Mello mentally growled, but then he stopped as he caught sight of another very sexy picture of Matt. The farther he got down the page the more he liked the pictures, that is until he saw one picture.

He growled at it, for the millionth time that day. Inside Mello felt much more angry than I was acting. Mello took a glance at his friend as he continued playing his game.

"Get in the bedroom now." Mello said as his blonde hair shadowed his eyes.

"What? I never did anything!"

"Room, now."

"But-" Mello slammed the laptop shut and dropped it on the table, not caring if it was damaged.

"NOW!" The blonde stood up, grabbed Matt by the collar of his striped shirt and drug him into the bedroom.

Meanwhile, the little leprechaun that had been hiding in the cupboard decided to see what was on the laptop. What he saw was not something that he really wasn't expecting. Even though he had no clue what was going on...

There, on the screen, was a picture of Matt with a collar around his neck. The dog collar was attached to a chain, and holding the chain was a certain recluse of an albino. Said albino looked fairly proud of himself, with something else hidden in his smirk.

_"No wonder a certain blonde was pissed off."_

The leprechaun didn't know what was going on, but he was sure that it wasn't going to be good. The little man knew that the blonde man was surely upset for some odd reason, and he thought that the red-headed boy was getting punished by said blonde.

Now, since the authoress is getting tired of calling the leprechaun "The leprechaun" she is just going to randomly call him Tony.

…...Tony is awesome...

Now back to Tony. The little man was worried for the striped boy, considering all the strange noises he was hearing from the room. The very small orange-haired man scurried to the door and what he saw through the small opening was something that he could not repeat.

…...Just because he won't doesn't mean I will do the same. It was hot, sexy, and nosebleed worthy.

Tony stood there frozen, with blood dripping down from his nose. Then all of a sudden he just fell over onto his face.

_**"HOLY SHIT THEY KILLED TONY!"**_

"Shut the hell up and let us continue fucking in peace!"

~~~A few hours later~~~

Mello was walking around the apartment, holding his gun, looking for a random girly figure standing in a corner. He couldn't believe that his girly subconscious came back. He was going to shoot her, fore he was certain that she was an actual person and not just his subconscious.

"Mello...?"

"What is it, Matt?" The blonde asked as he turned to look at the red-head. He could still see a presentable mark on his neck.

"Why is there a leprechaun in front of the door to our bedroom...?"

"A leprechaun? That's crazy." He said as he looked down, but sure enough, there was a leprechaun. "Alright, now that is something you don't see everyday."

_**"You both killed Tony when you both were having sex. He bled out."**_The two teens looked up when they heard racking sobs. They saw nothing though.

"What? Who is Tony?"

_**"Tony the leprechaun!"**_

"I thought you were my subconscious." Mello said as he aimed his gun towards the direction of the voice.

_**"That is what you think."**_The voice huffed.

"Mello, why is there a creepy girly voice in here?" Matt asked, making sure that Mello wasn't going crazy, like the blonde originally thought.

"She is here to annoy the hell out of me." Said blonde deadpanned before turning away to try and ignore everything.


	7. It Feels Like A Pinecone

**It Feels Like A Pinecone**

**I went through this already, I think, but I shall go through it again. I don't own Death Note, so therefore I don't own Light, L, Misa, Matsuda, or Aizawa.**

**I also don't own the song Umbrella. That song belongs to Rihanna.**

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><p>Light Yagami looked over at the raven haired detective as they worked on the case, or at least tried. The chain that was attached to both of their wrists didn't help matters at all. All of the task force members were either taking a break, at home, or scouting for stuff that was unknown to Light.<p>

He was getting tired of the silence, and the panda-eyed male wasn't helping anything at all. All he did was sit in that odd, crouched position while eating sweets. Not his idea of fun. The only thing that he wanted right now was to have some noise in the room. A part of him wanted that even more than he wanted to beat the detective sitting beside him.

So, what did Light do? He decided that it would be a good idea to get some noise by turning on the radio and turning it to some station that picked up songs from all across the world, mostly American music though. The first song that was playing happened to be from a woman by the name of Rihanna, and the raven haired male didn't mind the song. It was just slightly different from the other kinds of music he listened to. It had just recently started playing too.

_Know that we'll still  
>Have each other<em>

You can stand under my  
>Umbrella<br>You can stand under my  
>Umbrella<p>

"Light-kun, what are you listening to?" L asked as he turned to look at the younger male, just barely registering the footsteps that just came in through the door, meaning that some of the members had returned.

"Music." Was the reply that he got. L narrowed his eyes.

"I'm aware of that. What I meant was what kind of music, and why are you listening to it."

"It is Rihanna and why? You don't like her or something? Or is it just the music that you don't like?"

"I don't like the music." L looked irritated by the song, which had the young genius puzzled. L had never been seen irritated at anything before.

"Why not?"

"It feels like a pinecone getting shoved up my ass." Was all he said as he turned back to look back at the screen, leaving everyone to stare at him in shock. The ones who had just come into the room were Matsuda, Aizawa, and Misa. The latter had been running towards Light until she heard what L said and even she was looking at him in shock. The silence that engulfed the room seemed unbearable.

It wasn't just what he said that bothered Light.

It was how he said it.

How would he have known what having a pinecone shoved up your ass felt like?

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><p><strong>Okay, did anyone get the reference?<strong>

**If not, I will tell you that the pinecone line comes from a movie, and I want you guys to guess! Unless you already know than please say so in a review. I want to know that others like the movie as well. ^^**


	8. The School Bus Is Near

**The School** **Bus Is Near**

**I don't even know...**

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><p>"I don't think that this was the greatest idea that you have ever had." Matt commented to a very irritated looking Mello.<p>

"Oh, shut up!" Said blonde snapped. "It was just as much your fault as it was mine!"

"How was it? It was your idea! I just got dragged along!"

"It was your fault for not stopping me." The blonde retorted sharply. Though, he knew that he had messed up, knew it was his fault, but he was just too stubborn to do anything about it.

"I didn't even know what you were going to do!" The gamer cried indignantly.

"Well, now you do so it's your fault. As soon as you saw me slipping something into his food you should have stopped me."

Both of the teenagers looked towards the door as it opened, revealing Roger with Near at his side. The elderly man looked at the blonde and red head sternly before going to his desk and settling down in his chair.

"Now, what do you both have to say for yourselves?" The teens just looked at each other and then back at Roger, then at the younger albino that was playing with some toy cars on the floor, then back at Roger again. "Well?"

"Um...er..." The red head was scratching the back of his head in nervousness.

"What Matt means to say is that it was not our fault." Mello said, trying to save their asses.

"How was it not, Mello?" Roger asked, still having that stern look on his face.

"You see..." Mello tried to explain but then he fell silent when Matt elbowed him and pointed at the floor where Near had been just seconds before. "Where did Near go?"

"Don't change the subject matte-" Roger broke off when he looked around for Near and then he hurried out the door. Mello looked out the door and watched as the old man retreated. Once he had turned a corner the blonde looked back at his best friend.

"Come on, Matt." He said.

"Bu-" He was stopped short when Mello grabbed his arm and started to drag him down the hall.

"Come on and stop being a baby." The blonde stated as they trailed after Roger. Once they reached one of the many living rooms in the place they stopped before going in. Mello heard Linda's soft voice coming from inside the room along with Roger's stern voice. "They're in here." With that he drug Matt into the room.

"How is he?" Said red head asked as he stood against the wall with his best friend.

"Not good. Just look at him." Linda said when she turned to look at the duo. "Mello, you should be ashamed of yourself." Then she turned back to look at Near, concern flashing in her eyes.

The white haired pre-teen was currently playing with a small toy school bus, and looking at it with wide eyes as he made it fly through the air. He never made a sound, just continued to make it move and look at it with those eyes. Those eyes that were wider than they normally were, that should never be that wide on a person.

"Why should I feel ashamed?" Mello said in an uncaring manner. "He seems to be doing fine."

"I think you should re-think that statement." The boy beside him said as Near just stuck the front of the bus in his mouth while Roger and Linda were trying to get him to stop trying to eat it.

"Okay, maybe I could have thought this plan out more." Mello muttered.

"You see? This what happens when you put unknown substances in people's food."

"I knew what it was." Mello muttered, and his friend just shot him a look.

"Mello, what did you do to him to make him act like this?" Linda asked, almost as sternly as Roger had.

"Why should I tell you?"

"What. Did. You. Do?" She was acting extremely out of character at the moment, almost scary. We say 'almost' because Mello isn't the type to admit he is afraid of a girl that was younger than him.

"Nothing, really..."

"Near! Get that out of your mouth right now!" Roger's booming voice made the blonde shrink back from the girl in front of him.

"Let's just say LSD shouldn't be used as a prank..."


	9. JB Dies

**JB Dies**

**Okay, just so you know, I have nothing against JB. I just think he looks like a girl and sounds like a terrible singing girl. I am only writing that so you JB fans out there don't murder me...**

**I also have nothing wrong with MJ! I actually liked a couple of his songs! **

**I just felt like this had to be done... So I own nothing and I hope you don't kill me and at least try and enjoy?**

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><p>Light Yagami was busy writing in his favorite notebook of all time. The Death Note was the best note book that he had ever had. He enjoyed ridding the world of criminals but today he had a very important job to do. He needed to get rid of one of the most terrible people in the world.<p>

He grabbed his pen, and in his epic way, wrote down something as fast as possible. The sooner this person died, the better. It was for the good of all humanity.

He sat back in his chair to admire the magnificent hand writing that he did. Along with the wonderful words he wrote on the paper.

_**Justin Bieber  
>Time of Death: 12:05 AM<br>Dies because the ghost of Micheal Jackson returned and had anal sex with the younger man(?) multiple times until finally he dies of the pain his backside causes him, and the shock that his first sexual experience was with the ghost of a former child molester.**_

Light Yagami smirked at his work and patted himself on the back for a job well done. That was one less monster in the world. Even if L did find out that he was Kira, he would have to appreciate the favor that Light did for all of them.

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><p><strong>If you review this chapter don't review me saying how much you hate it because you like JB, because you will be ignored and this is my opinion. You have yours, and I have mine.<strong>

**If we have the same one, great!**


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